


Shattered

by drakamae



Series: Taking Chances [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Romance, F/M, Family Secrets, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Psychological Trauma, Torture, Travel, cool powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 10:57:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14567529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drakamae/pseuds/drakamae
Summary: “Tony, I’m not coming back. Not until I figure out what they tried to hide from me. I know you won’t understand, but I need you to respect that. I promise I’ll be back, but not until I find this.” I heard him speak again, but I forced myself to hang up the phone, facing James again. “Let’s get out of here.” I said, my eyes searching for anyone that looked suspicious.orBucky and Phoebe are trying to figure out why they're so messed up, but end up digging deeper than they expected.





	Shattered

_“Gavno!”_ (Shit) I swore, hissing and pulling my hand back from the small pan I was using.

I wasn’t used to cooking. Maybe a frozen pizza, or the small meals you could buy for a dollar at Walmart. But I was not used to cooking real, _really hot_ food. Let alone in a pan. So, using hot pads was something I still had to get used to.

James and I had been travelling for about a month and a half. A week after we had left, we found ourselves back in Sokovia. We had wanted to get near where I was sent on my last mission, so we could find out why they were keeping Bucky there, and why my commander had sent me there to find him. But when we got there, Bucky panicked.

I couldn’t blame him. Everyone in the town reeked of HYDRA. We only had half-assed disguises and it wouldn’t take long for someone to notice he was wearing gloves on a perfectly sunny day.

We laid low in Zhavoronki, Russia for a few days before we found a small, broken down house that was for sale. It didn’t make much sense when we saw the sign, because it was such a small town. When we talked to the small woman who owned the house, however, she told us that many people stayed in Zhavoronki while they were on missions for their church.

The woman nearly stroked out when I handed her 65,000 rubles ($1,000) for the property. It was a small dent in what I had pulled out before we left for Sokovia, and I could live without it if it meant having a place to sleep.

The house was small, but it was nothing I hadn’t experienced in special forces. There was only a kitchen with an attached dining room, a living room and a small bathroom, but it was more than enough space for us.

The woman had left a bed and couch in the living room, with a small television that only had two channels, at most. We had picked up more clothes along the way; it was getting colder out and I hadn’t picked up a sweatshirt when we had first gone shopping.

We couldn’t just stop and pick up premade meals from Walmart, or anywhere popular, really. Tony had stayed silent after I had sent him my letter, letting everyone believe I had gone rogue. We couldn’t be sure if there were still people looking for us- other than HYDRA- or where they would be.

So, we went mildly domestic. One of the neighboring towns holds a small farmer’s market twice a week, and a lot of the people from Zhavoronki sell their crops there, so we go every once in a while, as well. No one knows where we live, besides the woman we bought the house from, and apparently the money was enough to keep her quiet.

But, that was how I ended up in the kitchen, attempting to cook some kind of stir fry James had recommended. He said it was easy to make, but I was extremely challenged when it came to cooking. Tony hated that about me.

I pulled the pan off of the stove, setting it on the hot pad next to the stove and rushed to the sink, running the cold water over the palm of my hand, cooling off the scorching heat.

Grabbing the towel next to the sink, I wrapped my hand and turned around to move back to the stove, freezing in place before stumbling back as I came face-to-face with Bucky. He didn’t even flinch. Pushing a piece of hair out of my face, I leaned against the counter behind me before sighing and breaking the silence.

“You remember when we talked about personal space?” I asked lightly. He was standing close enough that, had I taken a step away from the sink, I would have run straight into him and probably fallen on my ass. He took a small step back before pulling my hand away from where I had cradled it against my chest. “It’s fine, James.” He had already gotten the burn cream from the cabinet in the bathroom, and was smearing it on my hand. “You know it’ll disappear before the cream does anything. I’m gonna have to toughen up sooner or later”

He stayed silent until he finished, setting the cream next to the sink and reaching for the cabinet that held the plates, pulling two out. “I choose later.” He replied, handing me a plate. I laughed and rolled my eyes, taking it from him. He scooped the contents of the pan onto both of the plates before heading back to where he had been sitting on the bed, notebooks scattered across it.

I grabbed the remote as I took a seat on the couch, turning the television off. James liked to watch it, to keep up with what was going on in the world. I didn’t like it so much. There was too much chaos going on, and every once in a while they liked to bring up the fact that Bucky and I had disappeared at the same time, refreshing the rumors that I was a traitor, or that I had been kidnapped.

We ate in silence for the most part, the only sound was James occasionally writing and our eating. Usually, James would take the time to tell me about whatever it was that he was writing down, or whatever he had remembered through the day. Tonight though, he was unusually tense.

“What’s eating at you?” I asked, walking the short distance to the kitchen and placing my plate in the sink. I would do the dishes later.

I leaned against the wall next to the bed, watching him but not getting too close. He sighed, flipping the notebook he was writing in shut and tugging a hand through his hair. He was quiet for a moment before he sighed again, not looking at me when he spoke.

“I remembered one of my missions today.” He said, picking at the old quilt on the bed. I nodded, moving a few of his notebooks over and sitting on the end of the bed, watching. “You’re going to hate me.” He sighed, finally looking up to me.

“I’m not going to hate you, James.” I said, patting his knee in comfort and waiting, hoping he was comfortable enough to tell me.

“It’s the earliest mission I can remember. I’m almost sure that it’s the first one they sent me on.” I nodded, motioning for him to continue. “Zola was still after the serum. Whatever he had used to create me was improvised and it was dangerous. He knew the real one was still out there. Stark had it.”

I swallowed harshly at the mention of my father. Trying not to make my uneasiness obvious, I tugged at the ends of my hair. James knew Howard Stark was my father.

We had come across an interview in one of the airports where Tony had been talking while there was a picture of my face in the upper corner. He had asked me about it on the flight and I had delved into the long story of how Howard Stark had gone unhinged and met my mother, thus creating me.

I hated the story, honestly. The amount of times my mother told me that story was well above any other. I barely knew anything about her, because she spent so much of her time talking about him. Even when I was fifteen, watching my mother wither away on her deathbed with cancer, she was still talking about Howard Stark. It was incredibly awkward.

James had to take another breath to calm his breathing before continuing. “They had me follow him and his wife after they left their house. He had the serum in his trunk. My mission was to get the serum back. And that I had to kill them.” He couldn’t even look up anymore, instead he was staring at his legs, one sat under him and the other hanging off the bed.

“Is that all?” I asked. I had heard the story about my father’s death from Natasha. Before SHIELD fell. I knew it was an inside job by HYDRA, and that they had gotten away with the serum. When I heard about the Winter Soldier, it would have surprised me less if he hadn’t been involved.

James looked utterly shocked at my response and he stuttered for a moment before he replied. “I just told you I killed your father in cold blood and that’s your response?” He asked.

I thought for a moment before shrugging and nodding, humming an affirmative. “Natasha told me someone from HYDRA killed my parents to get ahold of the serum. When they told me about the Winter Soldier, and that you worked for HYDRA, it just made sense.”

He nodded in return, “I have to say, I didn’t expect you to be the first person that didn’t try to kill me and avenge their loved one.” I let out a slight laugh and he smiled a bit.

“Well, there’s a lot you don’t know about me yet, Barnes. We’re going to have to change that.”

A serious look came over his face again and he nodded, silently agreeing with me.

* * *

 

_A/N: I know, okay! I know, it's been almost a YEAR since I even started this second story, but my life has been one heck of a mess. This story has been calling out to me since I started it, and I can now say I have all the info I need to finish it. This one took a lot of research on destinations and whatnot, so most of the places I've written about here are real! I still love this story, I've never been able to stop working on it, but I think I was waiting on Infinity War so I knew what direction to take it in. I think it is safe to say I will be venturing on my own little path with this one. I hope you enjoy the return. Much love <3_


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